That Special Place

So I know it’s been awhile.

I’ve recently come back home for Summer so I’ve been busy settling back into work and family life. Truth be told, I was pretty nervous about coming back. I almost didn’t. But I’m so glad I did. I’ve had a few awkward moments, seen some people I didn’t really want to see, but overall I’ve had a good time and I’ve enjoyed work and catching up with my friends and family.

So this post is more of a catch up post. I’m actually okay and I’m doing so much better than I was. I’ve stayed on Citalopram but my GP has upped the dosage and so far I’ve been getting along with my medication. I’ve really seen an improvement in my overall mood and attitude. Being surrounded by loved ones has really helped. Although I have my down days, I’m trying to remain positive and so far I’m succeeding.

I had a minor setback yesterday which is mainly why I’ve taken to the blog again. I wanted to write what happened down so I remember it. I had a rough day at work, I left in a rush and had negative thoughts. I wanted alcohol and I knew I had spare vodka at home. I tried to distract myself on my walk home by listening to loud music but even that didn’t work.

So I found myself veering off course once I reached a particular spot. I used to go to this place with someone that meant alot to me. And still does although we no longer see each other. I hesitated before entering this place but I went there regardless. And I’m glad I did. I had a good cry after switching my music off but being there calmed me. I felt better. I went home and I didn’t have a drink which I’m proud of.

I am better than that. I don’t need alcohol to block out how I feel because I’m getting stronger.

Love, Medikitty